RECOGNIZING SELF-SABOTAGE IN PURSUIT OF YOUR WEIGHT LOSS AND FITNESS GOALS
When it comes to health, fitness and weight loss goals, most people focus on the physical: what to eat, how to move, which “plan” to follow. But the truth is, the biggest obstacle isn't always your body -- it's usually your mind (or your mindset). One of the most common (yet sneakiest) roadblocks we see with our clients is self-sabotage.
In this week’s post, we’re diving into what self-sabotage is, how to spot it and ultimately, how to decide if self-sabotage is the thing that’s been holding you back from making progress towards your nutrition and fitness goals.
First, What Is Self-Sabotage?
Self-sabotage is when you unconsciously (or sometimes consciously!) act in ways that undermine your own goals. Self-sabotage shows up as resistance to change, fear of failure, or even fear of success. Sometimes it's loud and obvious; other times, it shows up quietly in your daily choices. When we self-sabotage, we typically end up working against ourselves, even though we want to succeed.
Self-sabotage isn’t about laziness or lack of willpower — it’s about conflicting emotions or beliefs that lead to behaviors that derail your progress.
When it comes to health and fitness, self-sabotage isn’t usually a nutrition or fitness issue, it’s often a mindset and behavior change opportunity. You might be doing everything right and still feel stuck. If that sounds familiar, read on and let’s talk through it!
The science behind self-sabotage
We sabotage ourselves for many reasons:
Comfort zones: Change feels risky, and your brain loves the familiar.
Low self-worth: If you don’t believe you deserve success, you may unconsciously avoid it.
All-or-nothing mindset: One "slip" leads to a spiral of giving up entirely.
Fear of success: What happens if it actually works? Who will you become? Will changing feel uncomfortable?
Biological adaptation for survival: Our brains are wired to attain rewards and avoid threats, which includes hypothetical threats, too. Self-sabotage happens when avoiding the threat overrides attaining the reward. When in a growth process (often part of pursuing goals or working towards long-term change) there are many times when the risk feels greater than the reward (and hormones like dopamine and cortisol) tell us that.
Sound heavy? It can be! But once we recognize the patterns of self-sabotage and why they happen, we can start feeling less “out of control” and more aligned with the habits we want to practice.
Do You Self-Sabotage?
Wondering if self-sabotage is affecting your progress? Read through this checklist and be honest with yourself— remember that awareness is the first step to change. If you’re nodding along to a few of these, you might be self-sabotaging without even realizing it!
DO YOU PROCRASTINATE ON TAKING ACTION?
Examples: Do you say "I'll start Monday"... every week? Or you keep saying, “I’ll start eating healthier next week,” or “I’ll join the gym after things calm down.” You delay workouts, meal prep, or even small steps like drinking more water.
Why it’s self-sabotage: Constantly pushing your goals to “someday” keeps you stuck in place. Progress requires starting now, even imperfectly. We are always talking about progress over perfection with our clients and part of long-term progress is adopting a more flexible mindset, which takes me to my next point…
ARE YOU AN “ALL-OR-NOTHING” THINKER?
Examples: You miss one workout and think, “I blew it, so I might as well skip the rest of the week.” Or you eat a cookie and decide the whole day is ruined, so you raid the pantry.
Why it’s self-sabotage: Perfectionism sets you up for failure. Research actually shows that dichotomous thinking (the fancy name for “all-or-nothing”) in individuals pursuing weight loss goals is less successful with regard to long-term progress than those who pursue the same goals with a more flexible mindset. Progress is about consistency, not flawless execution. One misstep doesn’t undo your efforts.
DO YOU MAKE EXCUSES THAT FEEL JUSTIFIED?
Examples: Do you avoid setting goals because you’re afraid you won’t reach them? “I’m too busy to cook healthy meals,” “I deserve this treat because I had a rough day,” or “I can’t exercise because I don’t have the right equipment.”
Why it’s sabotage: Excuses often mask fear or discomfort with change. While they feel valid in the moment (and sometimes they might be!), they can distract you from finding solutions that move you forward.
ARE YOU STUCK IN A LOOP OF NEGATIVE SELF-TALK?
Examples: Do you talk negatively about yourself or your progress? You tell yourself, “I’ll never stick to this,” “I’m not disciplined enough,” or “Other people can do this, but I can’t.”
Why it’s sabotage: Your thoughts shape your actions, and if you’re constantly tearing yourself down, it’s hard to stay motivated or believe you’re capable of change. These limiting beliefs also evoke a “fixed mindset”, which can be a huge barrier in itself for making short-term and long-term progress.
DO YOU OVERCOMPLICATE YOUR PLANS?
Examples: Do you often start strong with a new plan, only to quit within a few weeks? You dive into a super restrictive diet, try to overhaul your entire lifestyle overnight, or obsess over every macro and calorie instead of focusing on simple, sustainable habits.
Why it’s sabotage: Overwhelm leads to paralysis, and making things too complex can make you feel defeated before you even start. This line of thinking also tends to be a sneaky symptom of the all-or-nothing mindset that we have talked about.
ARE YOU STUCK IN A COMPARISON TRAP?
Examples: Do you frequently compare yourself to others? You scroll through social media and think, “I’ll never look like them, so why bother?” or “They’re so much further along—I’m failing.”
Why it’s sabotage: Comparison shifts your focus away from your journey. Measuring yourself against others can distract from your own progress. A core belief here at KLN is that nutrition is extremely personal and individual and that goes for your progress, too.
ARE YOU AFRAID OF WHAT WILL HAPPEN IF YOU SUCCEED?
Examples: Do you fear what success would mean for your identity or relationships? You start seeing results, but then slack off because you’re nervous about attention, maintaining progress, or what others might think if you change.
Why it’s sabotage: This is a sneaky one because sometimes, we don’t realize that we’re being held back by a fear of success; this fear is an innate one, meaning that it’s part of our survival mechanism! When you start to feel like you’re “in danger” (often a physiological response to growth and change) that can make you retreat to your comfort zone, even when you’re so close to breaking through into new habits or behaviors.
What to Do If You Recognize These Signs
If any of these resonated with you or sounded all too familiar, don’t beat yourself up. These aren’t moral failings; they’re you being human. Recognizing self-sabotage is a huge step toward overcoming it. Here’s how you can start turning things around:
Get curious instead of being critical: Instead of judging yourself, ask, “Why am I doing this? What’s really going on?” Maybe it’s stress, fear, or an old belief you can challenge.
Start with small wins: Pick one tiny habit—like drinking a glass of water first thing in the morning—and stick to it. Small wins build momentum.
Reframe setbacks: A slip-up isn’t failure; it’s data. Learn from it and keep going. This requires some introspection, and that’s a good thing!
Ask for support: A coach (hi, that’s us!), friend, or community can help you stay accountable and cheer you on when things feel tough.
Self-sabotage doesn’t have to define your health journey. Remember: you deserve to feel strong, healthy, and confident in your body. Growth might feel uncomfortable, but staying stuck is worse.
We are committed coaches who work with committed clients and love nothing more than helping our clients find a sustainable approach to nutrition that allows them to work towards their goals without white-knuckling their way through yo-yo diets. Learn more about our KLN team here!